Life’s a Party, Crash It

Last weekend the Baseball Widow and I crashed a wedding. Yep, you
read that correctly, we crashed a wedding, well, sort of.  A friend of my
wife, with whom she works, was getting married.  The running joke was that
she was going to crash the wedding.  Several weeks ago, the bride brought
my wife an invitation with the instructions to come after dinner and dance and
party with everyone else.
Normally, I would say no way.  My
wife was making plans with others that got the same instructions and I
relented.  So, I was going to crash a wedding.  I started practicing
my art of balloon animals (I hope more than five people get that reference), I
started thinking of a  cool person I
could be and I started brushing up on my Wedding Crashing Etiquette, as if
there is such a thing.  The night before the wedding the bride texts my
wife and says that two people have bailed and asked if we wanted to come for
the entire reception, we had been called in from the bullpen.  Wedding
Crashing dreams dashed.
So my wife and I went to the wedding. I as
Don Harrison, a retired fire chief from New York, who happened to have selected
one of a handful of the vegetarian meals.  My wife went as Seth Kelly, I
didn’t catch his back story as I was still reeling from the vegetarian selection.
 It was a beautiful reception in the heart of Salem, Mass. and my wife and
I got a night out without the kids, winners all around.  Plus “UConn
Sucks” was chanted by all the Syracuse alum very often, and quite
randomly.  I was in heaven.
The next day my wife struck up a
conversation as we headed to my brother’s house in Manchester (By the Sea), and
stated that authorized Wedding Crashing could be the way to go and that had she
thought of it, that is how our wedding would have gone.  Is it law that
you have to spend $100-$300 a plate on some people you barely know, family you
never see and people that are friends with your parents and not particularly
you?  It makes perfect sense.
You could have the ceremony, have a small
intimate dinner with your immediate family and wedding party and then open up
the doors to the boozers that want to make fools of themselves on the dance
floor, what more could you ask for.  I would assume it is probably less
expensive and there is no stressing over centerpieces, meal selections and
table linens.  I really do wish my wife had come up with this idea.
 I would not have needed any selling, given the fact that when we went to
look at invitations I told the lady “I would rather do a mass e-mail”.
I think this is an idea in which its time
has come.  Unfortunately, too many people feel they need a
“traditional” wedding. You know the kind, on a beach somewhere, far
away, not in a church surrounded by hundreds of your closest friends and
family.  Tell me where, I want to crash it, I will supply the balloon

If you don’t take it from me, ask my wife.

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