Tuesday February 13, 2018.  That was my day of clarity.  I had a sleepless night because it was my first night with a CPAP machine.  I had recently been diagnosed with moderate sleep apnea.  During a sleep study just after the New Year I had stopped breathing 23 times an hour.  So that Monday night was the first time I used the machine full time at home.  It was an adjustment that I didn’t think I could do.

Most importantly on that day I stepped on the scale in my bathroom and I weighed in at a gasping 237 pounds.  I was the only person who saw this and yet I felt this overwhelming feeling of embarrassment.  Like the world was looking at me as “the fat guy”.

That was the day that I dedicated 2018 to be “The Year of Nick”.  Not only was I going to do something about my weight, I was refocusing my life.  I was going to be a better husband, a better father, a better employee, a better son and a better friend.  I was going to remove stressors in my life and I was going to take everything thrown at me with a grain of salt.

Prior to that day my wife and I had already decided we were going to try the diet called “The Whole 30”.  It was more of a plan to break unhealthy eating habits, reduce cravings and portions.  All of those were my weak spots.  My wife’s company was doing a challenge and she thought we should try it.  At this point I was willing to try anything and so we started our journey.

I am not going to write about what I ate daily and what my weigh-ins were, it’s very boring.  However, as I began this lifestyle change I decided that I wanted to take it further.  I wasn’t going to have a lifestyle change in the way I ate but also the way I lived.

I set a weight loss goal, seems normal right?  I did not set a timeline of when I wanted to lose that weight.  I figured it took me 45 years to put it on, why am I trying to stress myself in getting rid of it in 30 days.  It was unrealistic, and an unrealistic goal is the first step to failure.  I was not going to set myself up to fail.

I have battled weight issues my adult life.  Believe or not, the aforementioned 237 pounds wasn’t even the heaviest I had ever been.  Just over 13 years ago I weighed in the 250’s and I dropped 65 pounds.  I was in my early 30’s at the time, and had no children and significantly less responsibilities.  I was able to keep that weight off for the better portion of the decade.  I actually looked better at 40 than I did at 30.

I got too comfortable and the weight kept creeping back up. I took up biking, nothing.  I took up running, nothing.  At my physical last year I told my doctor I wanted to control my weight this year and asked for suggestions.  “Watch your diet” was all that he said.  He knew how active I was so exercise wasn’t the issue.  I was just taking in more calories than I was burning.  Plain and simple.

Could it be that easy? Yes.  I immediately remembered an article written by ESPN writer Bill Barnwell wrote in 2016 “The easiest way to lose 125 pounds is to gain 175 pounds” .  It was the swift kick in the ass I needed to get me motivated.

I am proud of what I have been doing, but also ashamed of having the need to do it.  I have made this futile attempt many times, but for some reason that number, 237, just stays in my mind and haunts me.  Maybe it’s because it’s the same number of the forbidden hotel room in “The Shining”.  Is that why it stuck this time?

People who know me could not believe I weighed as much as I did.  I have always been able to hide my weight and that’s probably why I got to where I was.  I was active, big and nobody noticed.  That’s a good thing, right?  No, it’s not.  The person next to me on the bathroom scale that morning, my conscience, noticed and it is all that mattered.

If you are overweight and reading this, I don’t want this to come off as “fat shaming”.  If you are comfortable and happy then you are fine.  A waitress at Disney World said to me last year, “You do you”.

I was not comfortable with the way I looked, I was not happy with the way I looked.  “I did me.”

Weight loss was not the only goal I wished to accomplish.  I was going to try something new that I have never done before to keep me motivated.  I decided I was going to run a half marathon.  That was a very ambitious goal for someone who never ran more than a 10K and weighed almost 240 pounds when he did it.  My wife has joined me in challenge and we will be running the Smuttynose Half Marathon on September 30th.

One of my passions, umpiring baseball, was taking a back seat so I could focus on my true passion, being a dad.  It was not uncommon for me to umpire a game every night of the week.  I loved it, I still love it.  But my girls are the most important thing to me and I was not going to be an absentee dad.

After the first 30 days I was starting to feel better and I had dropped 13 pounds, so I decided that this was going to be the way I ate for the foreseeable future.  Cutting out processed foods is not as hard as one would think; it’s all about the discipline.  Being Italian and not being able to eat pasta at my parents’ house on Sunday, proves that I can do this.  My mom has even started making meals that fit my new lifestyle.

One of the constants I have been doing, which has been known to be a cardinal sin in weight loss, is I weigh myself every morning.  It is a daily reminder, and motivation, that I need to keep this journey going.  I still don’t trust my myself to not revert back to my old habits, and that’s why I do it.

Although, I am the sole recipient of the results that have come, I have not done this alone.  There are countless people that have just been so encouraging throughout the process. People I haven’t seen in years will send me messages of encouragement.  If someone I know passes me while out for a run, they will honk or yell words of support.  You have no idea how much those beeps and screams mean to me.  I may not have said thank you at the time, but I say it in my mind every day.

I especially want to thank my wife Darcy.  She has never said anything about my weight.  She loves me for who I am, inside and out, unconditionally.  But when I started to rail against myself, she became my life coach, my number one fan, and my true partner.  I could not have done this without her, and I could not imagine doing it with anyone else.

It has been just over 6 months and I am happy to say that I have lost 38 lbs., I feel great and my half marathon training is going well.  I have not needed to use the CPAP machine, but I still have it, and will try to get off of it entirely.

I had my annual physical and my doctor said “Did you really lose 38 lbs. from last year?”  He went on to cancel cholesterol and blood sugar screenings because based on the weight loss he said they would have improved from last year, which weren’t terrible to begin with.  Then I on to tell him I lost it in six months.

What makes my story more special than any other weight loss story? Nothing.  Everyone has a weight loss story and this is mine.  Share yours with me, I’d like that.

My wife has also dropped over 25 lbs. and now I need to stay fit to keep up with my “Hot Wife”.  I do not regret any decision I have made over the past 6 months and “The year of Nick” will now be called “The Life of Nick”

By Nick D’Andrea

In 2005, the Baseball Widow came home from work and said “Michael Graham just said something I thought was pretty cool”.  She went on to explain to me the tradition that Graham and his wife had going to see the Oscars Best Picture nominees.  I like movies and the idea and I said “Let’s do it”.  That year, “Crash” took the award and we haven’t looked back since.

The biggest mistake that the Oscars made was going from 5 to 9 films in 2009. That was the same year that the first Baseball Orphan was born and made going to the movies just that more difficult.  It also watered down the nominations.  There are always movies that don’t belong, or are not in the running because there are too many films.

It also made the “snub” list for acting that much greater because they are still nominating 5 actors/actresses for those.  Nine Best Picture nominees and five Best Actor nominees?  Someone is going to get snubbed.  I will continue to wage this war, every year.

Anyhow, here is my Best Picture preview:

2017 Oscars Best Picture Nominations (order of viewing)

Moonlight – I get why this was nominated, but for me there was something missing.  The acting, tremendous.  The cinematography, outstanding.  The direction, fantastic.  The story, lacking.  I know it is customary for Indie films to just end and leave the viewer wanting more.  The story in Moonlight had me wanting more because there was a lot I didn’t get.  There were references to the gaps in the movie, but not enough to sustain me.  If the story were told better, this wins hands down!

Hidden Figures – I am glad this got nominated because I wanted to see it anyway, nothing like forcing the hand.  I loved everything about this movie.  The acting, Henson, Spencer, Monae and Costner were just awesome.  The story is not only one of struggle but perseverance.  I went into this movie with high expectations and I was not disappointed.  The reason I don’t think this movie will win best picture is, dare I say it, it was too Hollywood.  The Academy normally dismisses these types of movies, especially since they have gone to 9 films (I will not let this go).  Ten years ago, this is a favorite.  I hope it wins, but unlikely

Lion – If you liked Slumdog Millionaire, you will love this movie as well.  Not because Dev Patel plays the main character.  It brings light on similar issues and has a de facto same story line.  The difference on this one, is that it actually happened.  The cast was great.  Kidman and Patel earning acting nominations, deservedly so.  I would have liked to see Rooney Mara get a nod as well, her performance in this film was highly underrated.  The director did a good job getting inside the main character’s head to visualize what he was going through, he should have gotten nominated for best director.  I guess the nomination for cinematography will suffice.  I think this is a longshot to win but definitely a must see

Hell or High Water – How did this movie get nominated??  I know, because we are nominating too many movies!!!  We literally watched a bank robber chase for 90 minutes. I have seen episodes of Chicago P.D. done better than this movie.  Chris Pine was the only acting job worth noting.  I know Jeff Bridges was nominated but I did not think he was anything special in this film.  I will have to say that the only bright spot for this film was the music throughout was great.  But if you don’t like the bluegrass/country type of music, you won’t think so.  I rank this higher than a Wes Anderson film, but that’s not saying a lot.  If this wins, I quit

La La Land – Ok, so this is the overwhelming favorite. I just don’t get it. It was a good movie, but not one that would say “I have to go see it”. If you are going into this movie thinking that it takes places in the 40’s/50’s…wrong answer. The good thing is that it is not a musical from beginning to end, which was my biggest fear. The acting was good, the story was overly predictable and part of the ending was somewhat irrelevant. Emma Stone was good as always and deserved her best actress nomination. Ryan Gosling’s acting was par for the course and as the Baseball Widow would say “Ryan Gosling can’t sing for….”. This movie is the favorite because it is a nostalgia film. It brings us back to the films of Ginger Rogers and Fred Astaire. There was no swearing, nudity or violence. La La Land is this year’s version of “The Artist” (2012 Best Film), for the record I didn’t get that movie either.

Arrival – THE OSCARS ARE NOMINATING TOO MANY MOVIES.  Full Disclosure, I am not big into Sci-Fi movies.  I was willing to give this one a chance because of the cast. Adams, Renner and Whitaker are about as solid a cast you can get.  I just thought the premise of the movie was weird, and I thought the ending was more confusing than it needed to be.  It did go away from the traditional “Aliens invade earth” mantra of death and destruction but this film is just not Best Picture worthy.

Hacksaw Ridge – I loved this movie.  It kept my attention the whole time from the moment he was a boy to the real life footage and interviews that closed out the movies.  The story of Desmond Doss is one of true patriotism and faith.  Andrew Garfield gets better with every movie he does and will be a serious contender for Best Actor.  I felt Hugo Weaving’s performance father Tom Doss was excellent and was a true portrayal of PTSD soldier.  This movie may be a bit too Hollywood but along with Hidden Figures it is definitely the best picture thus far.

Manchester By The Sea – The local favorite.  Overall a very good movie and deserving of its Best Picture nomination.  Casey Affleck once again proved he is the better acting Affleck.  His character was a mess from start to finish and he definitely brought that home with his performance.  Michelle Williams was not in the movie enough to warrant a Best Supporting Actress nod, but the one scene everyone knows, she was fantastic in.  I thought the movie dragged at points but it may have been designed to portray the main character’s struggle.  Lastly, Hollywood needs to stop portraying everyone in Massachusetts as someone who lives deep in Southie.  WE ALL DON’T SOUND LIKE THAT.  I really don’t think this one will bring it home, but it is definitely worth a watch.

Fences – A movie with very good acting and directing.  An adaptation of a play that starred Denzel Washington and Viola Davis.  I felt that the first 10 minutes or so of the movie had a stage like atmosphere.  Most of the scenes were shot in the same place (but not entirely).  It is a good story of man who has struggled with his place in the world from experience and wants to hold everyone else back because of it.  Denzel and Viola were great in the movie and will be serious contenders for their categories.  The Baseball Widow is really pulling for Davis for Best Supporting Actress and have a serious meltdown if she doesn’t.  I thought the movie dragged on a bit, but not too bad.  I don’t think it is the best film this year but would not be surprised if surprises and takes home the prize.  A definite must watch.

So, there you have a review of the Best Picture nominations.  A good group of films this year, not the best crop in recent history bust a good group none the less.  The Academy really needs to re-visit their pre-voting method to avoid certain movies from getting in and so that the lesser known films get their due.  So here is my predication

Who do I want to win?  Hacksaw Ridge, slightly over Hidden Figures.

Who will win?  La La Land, because, you know, Hollywood.